508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
He and I are in a competition of who can sleep with the most people at work. We're tied at two. I could win this if they'd stop hiring damn straight girls.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
