you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
