Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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