Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Randomize
