Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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