I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
Randomize