I just ate a cockroach and I want to be a fire truck.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
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