Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
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