That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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