Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
