Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize