I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
Randomize