roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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