my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Randomize