We won't sleep together?
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
Randomize
