i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
