More tranny stories later!
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I think I am morally bankrupt
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
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