hell yes lets make some ravioli
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
