I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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