That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize