Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
