My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
