Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
