How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
