Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
