okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I need a beard to bite.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
