He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Randomize