I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
She's the barista slut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
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