my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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