Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize