No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
