Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
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You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
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He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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