Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
