I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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