Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
Randomize