i just woke up and "where the fuck is taco bell" was in my search engine...
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
Randomize
