Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
dude i haven't had a solid dump since sunday and i still cant hear out of my right ear
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
