Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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