my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize