I want to make a zoo with you.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
