Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
