Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
