She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
