I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
