Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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