WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize
