Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
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