Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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