New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
