He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize