Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize
